Jane and Bingley

It's the smile; Bingley has the appeal of a really friendly puppy. If you watch the background scenes with Bingley, especially at Pemberley, he seems to be fairly consistently considerate and friendly. In many ways I agree with the recent poster (I'm sorry; I forget who, and it's too late to search) who suggested that for the long haul Bingley might make a better husband than Darcy.

Bingley is refreshingly honest and very affable chappie who is not only approachable but also forward with people. He's the sort of bloke who'd make few enemies, the sort of man most fathers would be happy to see their daughter marry. Bingley also has an energy that's lacking in Darcy in the early stages. Perhaps that is the vigour and enthusiasm of youth, but it's probably also his personality that overcomes all adversary including Darcy's reservation of Jane. It is no doubt his smiles and his friend y manner that disarms the sisters and for them to willingly accept his invitations at the ball.

I loved his last conversation with Darcy in P&P2: B: "Do I have your blessing, then?" D: "Do you need my blessing?" B: "No, but I would like to know I have it, all the same." And his simple, non-combatitive attempt to steer Caroline away from her determined Elizabeth-bashing at Pemberly: B: "I think that....." And Caroline just goes right on .. putting nails in her own emotional coffin, as it were.

Katy, I've always wondered about Bingley's last conversation with Darcy. In the A&E program notes, Crispin Bonham-Carter said he was glad that Andrew Davies had allowed Bingley to make a journey of his own and to grow up. Yet that last "Do I have your blessing" makes him seem like a son asking his father for his blessing and not grown up at all. I think it would have been better if he'd just told Darcy, "I'm going over to Longbourn to ask Jane to become my wife. I hope I have your approval." It would have shown that he'd made up his own mind regardless of Darcy's approval or not. Maybe it's nit-picking, but he still seemed so very young and puppyish to me at that point.

Inko: but Bingley has indeed made up his own mind. He says he WANTS D's blessing but he does not NEED it. This is more independence than JA allowed him to show.

#1: Bingley has the appeal of a really friendly puppy. An excellent description IMHO. I think Bingley's asking Darcy for his approval is just an extension of his wanting to be on good terms with all the people who are important to him. Had Darcy said no, I fully believe Bingley would have said, "That's too bad, Darcy; I would have liked to have had it, but it will not affect my actions." He's just a thoroughly likable guy.

I don't know -- Bingley was so easily led, I honestly wonder if he would have married Jane had Darcy still been disapproving. Did he have the backbone for it?

The thing is, if Darcy still disapproved, he wouldn't have made the confession about his interference would he? He would have left Bingley in the dark about Jane's real feelings and her being in town!!

I always thought Darcy just felt like he had to come completely clean. If he was going to marry Elizabeth, how could he possibly object to Bingley's marrying Jane, now that he knew she really did return his love? And yes, I think Bingley, having learned that Jane's being in town was kept from him and that she did try to see his family (she visited the sisters, remember) was hellbent on having her before something else happened!

The Lydia and Wickham elopement gives him an excuse,because he had to get them married first. After that he knew what he had to do for Bingely and Jane and for Elizabeth so she would forgive his interference. He said in his second proposal "You are too generous to trifle with me. If your feelings are still what they were last April,tell me so at once. My affections and wishes are unchanged; but one word from you will silence me on the subject for ever." He still wasn't that sure of his fate with E izabeth and it didn't matter,because he knew he repair his friendship with Bingley.

This is what I think Darcy told Bingley. Darcy Confesses

Ann -- that was wonderful. It seems very real to me. I shall have to read it again and again. Thank you very much for adding to our pleasure.

Oh yes, Ann, I can see Darcy staring into the fire, kicking at the logs, and getting his confession out! A heartwarming picture of real friendship between two men. I like it very well indeed!

Excellent! And fun!

I guess my question is: IF Darcy hadn't confessed his interference to Bingley, would B. have had the backbone to determine Jane's feelings for him on his own?

To defend Bingley just a little ... he had been told that the girl he loved did not care about him but would marry for the advantages it would give her. "Backbone" may not be what is lacking so much as confidence in his own judgment.

I think Bingley would have gone on being convinced that Jane didn't care for him as much as he wished; he was too easily convinced of this by his faith in his friends and family.

I guess that's what I mean by "backbone" -- he lacks the ability to trust his own instincts. (Think I've been unduly influenced by the current re-issue of STAR WARS?)

Let me tell you how fun it was to take my little guys to Star Wars. Big fans, both of them -- 8 and 12 years old -- but had never seen it on the big screen. When the Millenium Falcon first hits light speed? Whooooosh! If you could bottle those kids' faces at that moment --- you'd be set for life.

Amy - I agree. When I first saw "Star Wars" my boys were the ages of yours now and those faces were something to behold! Of course, we had to wait longer for the sequels - you can take them in a month or so!!

I saw the reissue in Westwood opening day. What a scene! We actually had a NEWS CREW in the back of the theatre filming us crazies in the audience! But getting back to Bingley. . .was the man so unable to ascertain his own (and Jane's) feelings that he was going to be _totally_ reliant on Darcy's version of events forever? Or not?

My personal feeling is that Bingley would probably not have returned to Netherfield w/o Darcy's encouragement. Once he was there, however, and was seeing Jane again, I really think he would have decided he had to know how she felt -- he would have proposed even without Darcy's confession. As long as Darcy stayed around, though, I think Bingley tended to rely on his friend's opinion. (Low self esteem again? After all, his own sisters never paid any attention to him!)

I hate to say you're right, Kathleen. But what kind of a mate is a guy who doesn't even know he likes you until somebody else tells him so? Does this auger well for the future?

Bingley knows that he is in love with Jane. He just doesn't know that Jane is in love with him! He is too unsure of himself to rely on his own intuition.

Isn't that kind of a problem?

It probably is a bit of a problem, but maybe one Bingley will outgrow. He is, after all, younger than Darcy, and has not had all the advantages of his friend. After marriage to Jane, I predict that of necessity Bingley will become his own man (and Jane's, of course). Besides, Darcy is used to being listened to -- by family, servants, tenants, and of course marriage-minded young ladies! Darcy would always assume he knows better, and that alone can carry a lot of weight w/ someone younger and less secure.

Darcy relied on his intuition and look what happen to him. He could not have been more wrong. Sort of ironic how that worked out,because if Bingley would have asked Jane she would have said yes. I think Darcy knew that she would say yes and for the wrong reasons. His "best" friend misled him and Bingley's friend was misled by himself. Hey, maybe Mr.D. should have asked Mr. Bingely for advice. Who does not rely on a best friends advice.

Just read 'Darcy's Story'. This whole sequence of events is laid out very nicely by the author; at least it was to my satisfaction. She does a wonderful job of 'humanizing' Darcy as she traces his mental progression from Elizabeth's confrontation about Jane and Bingley during the first proposal to the point where he achieves Bingley's return to Netherfield in order to try and reunite them. Done 'very well indeed'.