"Love thy neighbour as yourself, but choose your neighbourhood." -- Louise Beal "The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself." -- Will Rogers "Fools rush in where fools have been before." -- Unknown

An unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the bad ones. --William Somerset Maugham

"It is bad luck to be superstitious." - Andrew W. Mathis "A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat." - P. J. O'Rourke "Dealing with network executives is like being nibbled to death by ducks." - Eric Sevareid

"A musicologist is a man who can read music but can't hear it." -- Sir Thomas Beecham "The best defense against the atom bomb is not to be there when it goes off." -- Anonymous "Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress." -- Gandhi

"Politeness is one half good nature and the other half good lying." -- Mary Wilson Little "With the newspaper strike on, I wouldn't consider dying." -- Bette Davis, on being told that her death was rumored "I don't mind being miserable as long as I'm painting well." -- Grace Hartigan

I do not know what I may appear to the world; but to myself I seem to have been only like a boy playing on the sea-shore, and diverting myself in now and then finding a smoother pebble or a prettier shell than ordinary, whilst the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered before me. -Sir Isaac Newton (1642-1727) English physicist

With the Fourth fast approaching, I can think of no better way to celebrate the anniversary of America's independence than for us to remember what moved a determined band of patriots to lay down all for liberty, and then to promise never to forget. --Senator Joseph Lieberman (D) of Connecticut

"Call on God, but row away from the rocks." -- Indian Proverb "Be on the alert to recognize your prime at whatever time of your life it may occur." -- Muriel Spark "Life wouldn't be worth living if I worried over the future as well as the present." -- M. Somerset Maugham, "Of Human Bondage", 1915

"Men for the sake of getting a living forget to live." -- Margaret Fuller "Work is a necessity for man. Man invented the alarm clock." -- Pablo Picasso "Going to work for a large company is like getting on a train. Are you going sixty miles an hour or is the train going sixty miles an hour and you're just sitting still?" -- J. Paul Getty

Every religion is good that teaches man to be good. - The Rights of Man My country is the world, and my religion is to do good. - The Rights of Man -Thomas Paine

"Misquotations are the only quotations that are never misquoted." -- Hesketh Pearson "For most folks, no news is good news; for the press, good news is not news." -- Gloria Borger "The most wasted of all days is one without laughter." -- e. e. cummings

Once children learn how to learn, nothing is going to narrow their mind. The essence of teaching is to make learning contagious, to have one idea spark another. -Marva Collins American educator

"The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found." -- Calvin Trillin "Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer." -- Mark Twain "The intelligent man finds almost everything ridiculous, the sensible man hardly anything." -- Goethe (1749-1832)

Only in TEXAS??? Things just don't add up... Forty-six percent of Texas households have money invested in the stock market, compared with 52 percent that don't. -Scripps Howard Texas Poll

"The quickest way to end a war is to lose it." -- George Orwell "The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax." -- Albert Einstein (1879-1955) "Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do." -- Dale Carnegie

"An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible." -- Unknown "Trying to be a first-rate reporter on the average American newspaper is like trying to play Bach's 'St. Matthew's Passion' on a ukelele." -- Bagdikian's Observation "The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children." -- Clarence Darrow

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark. The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. -Plato

"If you have to swallow a frog, try not to think about it. If you have to swallow two frogs, don't swallow the smaller one first." - Unknown

Higher gasoline prices caused by the shortage of oil. The less oil we have, the higher the price at the pump. There are a lot of folks that can't understand how we ran out of oil here in the USA. Well, here's the answer: It's simple... nobody bothered to check the oil. We didn't know we were getting low! The reason for that is obviously geographical, all the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma, and all the dipsticks are in Washington, D.C.!!! -Submitted by Herr Kemper in honor of 'Dipstick Dan, the Motor Man'

The early bird who catches the worm works for someone who comes in late and owns the worm farm. -- Travis McGee

"The United States is like the guy at the party who gives cocaine to everybody and still nobody likes him." - Jim Samuels

If you don't say anything, you want be called on to repeat it. -Calvin Coolidge

Sugar Land .... there is no equal. -Slogan of Sugar Land, Texas Houston is a neighbor of Sugar Land Imperial Sugar company town prior to 1959

"Giving is the highest expression of our power." -- Vivian Greene Only in America can you turn to a Jew for your hail-Mary pass. --William Safire, August 10, 2000, New York Times on the Web

There is something going on right now in Mexico that I happen to think is cruelty to animals. What I'm talking about, of course, is cat juggling. --Steve Martin I have never liked working. To me a job is an invasion of privacy. --Danny McGoorty (1901-1970)

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." --Albert Einstein "Men are like a deck of cards. You'll find the occasional king, but most are jacks." --Laura Swenson

For Tom "I get out my work and have a show for myself before I have it publicly. I make up my own mind about it - how good or bad or indifferent it is. After that the critics can write what they please. I have already settled it for myself so flattery and criticism go down the same drain and I am quite free." - Georgia O'Keefe

"An expert is someone who knows more and more about less and less, until eventually he knows everything about nothing." --Anonymous

"Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by traffic from both sides." - Margaret Thatcher

Jogging just one mile a day enables you, at 85 years of age,to spend an additional 3 months in a nursing home at $5000 per month. -DrPhil

"If I feel strongly, I say it. I know I can do more good by being vocal than by staying quiet. I'd have a whole lot more money if I lied, but I wouldn't enjoy spending it." - Martina Navratilova

Happiness isn't something we experience, it's something we remember. -Oscar Levant

Always write a lot more letters than you send. -Dr. Jerry Niebaum TASSCC Conference January 24, 1994 * TASSCC - Texas Association of State Systems for Computing and Communications

"The reason people blame things on the previous generations is that there's only one other choice." --Doug Larson "Happy is said to be the family which can eat onions together. They are, for the time being, separate, from the world, and have a harmony of aspiration." --Charles Dudley Warner

"It's when you try to sprint down a ball that everyone thinks is going out of bounds and you think it is too. But you go after it anyway and you get to it. Maybe you don't make a great cross with it to win the game, but you pushed yourself beyond what you thought you could. That's what it will take to win the gold." - Mia Hamm

"Power (n): The only narcotic regulated by the SEC instead of the FDA." --Anonymous "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." �Fred Allen

Hanging onto bitterness and resentment is like eating poison and expecting somebody else to die. -Unknown

"Genius is the gold in the mine, talent is the miner who works and brings it out." - Lady Marguerite Blessington

"If you want to touch the other shore badly enough, barring an impossible situation, you will. If your desire is diluted for any reason, you'll never make it." - Diana Nyad

Tax reform means "Don't tax you, don't tax me, tax that fellow behind the tree." -Russell Long

"The time when you need to do something is when no one else is willing to do it; when people are saying it can't be done." - Mary Francis Berry

"Well, I thought my razor was dull until I heard his speech." --Groucho Marx

===========FRIENDS============= "If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you."' -- Winnie the Pooh "True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost." --- Charles Caleb Colton "A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out." "Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. Walk beside me and be my friend." --- Albert Camus. "Strangers are just friends waiting to happen." "Friends are the Bacon Bits in the Salad Bowl of Life." "Friendship is one mind in two bodies." --- Mencius "Friends are God's way of taking care of us." "If you should die before me, ask if you could bring a friend." ---Stone Temple Pilots "I'll lean on you and you lean on me and we'll be okay." -----Dave Matthew's band "If all my friends were to jump off a bridge, I wouldn't jump with them, I'd be at the bottom to catch them" "Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say." "We all take different paths in life, but no matter where we go, we take a little of each other everywhere" --- Tim McGraw "My father always used to say that when you die, if you've got five real friends, then you've had a great life." ---Lee Iacocca "Hold a true friend with both your hands." ---Nigerian Proverb "A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words." ---unknown

"Our goals can only be reached through a vehicle of a plan in which we must fervently believe and upon which we must vigorously act. There is no other route to success." - Stephen A. Brennan

If you want to go to Hell for stealing minnows, I'll furnish the minnows. -Miz Tackett (Sign over unattended minnow tank, Red River County, Texas)

"Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg." --Unknown

"Good business leaders create a vision, articulate the vision, passionately own the vision, and relentlessly drive it to completion." - John Welch

"Reason often makes mistakes, but conscience never does." - Josh Billings Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment. -Robert Benchley

"Time has convinced me of one thing: Television is for appearing on--not for looking at." --Noel Coward "I hate television. I hate it as much as peanuts. But I can't stop eating peanuts." --Orson Wells "I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city, keeping it's SPEED above fifty, and if it's SPEED dropped, it would explode. I think it was called 'The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down'." --Homer Simpson "If you don't have anything nice to say about anyone, come sit next to me." --Olympia Dukakis, Steel Magnolias "Nothing is over until we decide it is. Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!!" --John Belushi, Animal House "Televison is now so desperately hungry for material that they're scraping the top of the barrel." --Gore Vidal

There are some days I practice positive thinking, and other days I'm not positive I am thinking. -John M. Eades

When elephants fight, it is the grass that suffers. -Unknown

"Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle." - Abraham Lincoln "A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students." --John Ciardi "I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me." --Woody Allen "Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on Earth." --Will Rogers "In the hands of a teenager, a seat belt buckle is a lethal weapon." --National Highway Traffic Safety Administration Official on why there are no seatbelts on public school buses "Our schools have been scientifically designed to prevent over-education from happening....The average American [should be] content with their humble role in life, because they're not tempted to think about any other role." --U.S. Commissioner of Education William Harris, 1889 "I have never let my schooling interfere with my education." --Mark Twain

Today's dry quotes... "Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect." --Mark Twain "Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped." --Groucho Marx "Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others." --Groucho Marx "I don't want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their jobs." --Samuel Goldwyn "A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it." --Bob Hope "Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys." --P. J. O'Rourke

I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought: What good would that do? -Ronnie Shakes

Re the Groucho quote above, John Burnett adds: Actually, Groucho's quote was "Either I'm dead or my watch has stopped." And those were reportedly his final words. The man was a trouper to the end.

If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend. -Doug Lars

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. -Henny Youngman

"I've always believed that if you put in the work, the results will come. I don't do things halfheartedly. Because I know if I do, then I can expect halfhearted results." - Michael Jordan It matters not whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose. -Darrin Weinberg

Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic. -- Ambrose Bierce "Courage and perseverance have a magical talisman, before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into air." - John Quincy Adams

Senators William B. Spong of Virginia and Hiram Fong of Hawaii sponsored a bill recommending the mass ringing of church bells to welcome the arrival in Hong Kong of the U.S. Table Tennis Team after its tour of Communist China. The bill failed to pass, cheating the Senate out of passing the Spong-Fong Hong Kong Ping Pong Ding Dong Bell Bill.

A man is not idle because he is absorbed in thought. There is visible labor and there is invisible labor. - Victor Hugo It's hard to detect good luck, it looks so much like something you've earned. - Fred A. Clark The truth is, if you asked me to choose between winning the Tour de France and cancer, I would choose cancer. Odd as it sounds, I would rather have the title of cancer survivor than winner of the Tour, because of what it has done for me as a human being, a man, a husband, a son, and a father. - Lance Armstrong (09/18/1971-) "It's Not About the Bike: My Journey Back to Life"

"The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of klnowledge, but rather a lack of will." - Vince Lombardi "The person who goes farthest is generally the one who is willing to do and dare. The sure-thing boat never gets far from shore." - Dale Carnegie

"Pick battles important enough to fight and small enough to win." ~ Johnathan Kozol "Men show their character in nothing more clearly than by what they think is laughable." ~Johanne Goethe

Lives of great men all remind us, We can make our lives sublime, And, departing, leave behind us Footprints on the sands of time. ~H.W. Longfellow The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good. ~Ann Landers

"If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; if we did not sometimes taste the adversity, prosperity would notbe so welcome." - Anne Bradstreet

I prefer the company of peasants because they have not been educated sufficiently to reason incorrectly. - Michel Eyquem de Montaigne (02/28/1533-1592) You can only get a true reaction, response or understanding from people when you speak their own language. - E Pringle Monsanto should not have to vouchsafe the safety of biotech foods. Our interest is to sell as much of it as possible. Assuring it's safety is the FDA's job. - Phil Angell, Monsanto's director of corporate communication Q. Should you compare something "to" something else or "with" something else? A. Either is correct but most wordsmiths say you should compare something WITH something similar, while comparing something TO something different. If we don't change, we don't grow. If we don't grow we are not really living. Growth demands a temporary surrender of security. It may mean a giving up of familiar but limiting patterns, safe but unrewarding work, values no longer believed in. As Dostoevsky put it, "Taking a new step, uttering a new word, is what people fear most". - Gail Sheehy Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. - David Lloyd George We can let circumstances rule us, or we can take charge and rule our lives from within. - Earl Nightingale (-1989) Let right be done. - "The Winslow Boy" Give the world the best that you have, and the best will come back to you. - Madeline Bridges

Today's Quotes.... "This is not about momentum. It is about substance. I actually think that the best substance in the end is the best politics. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that that's true." ~ Vice President Al Gore If you can't convince them, confuse them. ~ Harry S. Truman

"I think it's probably a good thing to be considered stable, but with a capacity for madness." ~ Wayne Coyne of The Flaming Lips "Worrying about something is like paying interest on a debt you don't even know if you owe." ~ Mark Twain

A filthy mouth will not utter decent language. -- Chinese Proverb A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world. Everyone you meet is your mirror. -- Ken Keyes, Jr.

"Seek first to understand, then to be understood." -- Stephen Covey "Many people may listen, but few people actually hear." -- Harvey Mackay "It seems rather incongruous that in a society of super sophisticated communication, we often suffer from a shortage of listeners." -- Erma Bombeck "If you wish to appear agreeable in society, you must consent to be taught many things which you already know." -- Johann Caspar Lavater "Most of us tend to suffer from 'agenda anxiety', the feeling that what we want to say to others is more important than what we think they might want to say to us." -- Nido Qubein

Let your ears hear what your mouth says. -- Jewish Proverb The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug. -- Mark Twain

"There is no going alone on a journey. Whether one explores strange lands or Main Street or one's own backyard, always invisible traveling companions are close by: the giants and pygmies of memory, of belief, pulling you this way and that, not letting you see the world life-size but insisting that you measure it by their own height and weight." - Lillian Smith

"We are the people our parents warned us about." ~ Jimmy Buffett "We are sorry to announce that Mr Albert Brown has been quite unwell, owing to his recent death, and is taking a short holiday to recover." ~ Parish Magazine

At a recent fundraiser, a politician was asked if he knew what Roe versus Wade was. He said he reckoned it was the decision that George Washington needed to make when he planned to cross the Delaware.

Many a man has been a wonder to the world, whose wife and valet have seen nothing in him that was even remarkable. - Michel Eyquem de Montaigne (02/28/1533-1592) Focus on where you want to go, not on what you fear. - Anthony Robbins The rock business has all the moral dignity of drug trafficking. - Allan Blum, "The Closing of the American Mind" Q. Which inventors came up with whole families of inventions? A. There have been two notable instances of inventors devising lots of interlocking inventions rather than one particular thing. Gutenberg didn't just invent the printing press -- he adapted a wine press for better printing impressions, came up with a rust-resistant metal alloy for type and devised an oil-based ink that could be dyed. Edison invented the entire system by which electricity is now distributed. It's a very tough, competitive world but I don't mean you have to cheat or steal to survive. You can change people by selling them the right way, and wind up with their money and their friendship. In fact if you don't get both, you won't be in business very long. - Joe Girard (02/01/28-) "How To Sell Anything To Anybody" You find that you have piece of mind and can enjoy yourself, get more sleep, and rest when you know that it was a 100% effort that you gave -- win or lose. - Gordie Howe I am convinced that some political and social activities and practices of the Catholic organizations are detrimental and even dangerous for the community as a whole, here and everywhere. I mention here only the fight against birth control at a time when overpopulation in various countries has become a serious threat to the health of people and a grave obstacle to any attempt to organize peace on this planet. - Albert Einstein, letter, 1954 Easy to do justice. Very hard to do right. - "The Winslow Boy" Commit yourself to a dream. Nobody who tries to do something great but fails is a total failure. Why? Because he can always rest assured that he succeeded in life's most important battle--he defeated the fear of trying.

If you can't bite, don't show your teeth. -- Yiddish Proverb A sharp tongue and a dull mind are usually found in the same head. -- Anon

If you take care of your character, your reputation will take care of itself. -- American Proverb And Then There's... You have two things in this world...your name and your word... no one can take them away from you, but you.

When something can be read without effort, great effort has gone into its writing. -Enrique Jardiel Poncela

Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself. - Leo Tolstoy When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You know that your name is safe in their mouth. - a child's response when asked "What does love mean?" It is said that man's ability to reason is what separates him from the animals, but then again the animal kingdom has no equivalent to "championship wrestling." Q. Why is the person who's made to take the blame for others called a "scapegoat"? A. In Leviticus 16:20, Aaron is instructed by God to do the following: "[H]e shall bring forward the live goat. He shall lay both his hands on its head and confess over it all the iniquities of the Israelites and all their acts of rebellion, that is all their sins; he shall lay them on the head of the goat and send it away into the wilderness." This goat, which bore the sins of the children of Israel, came to be called the "escaping goat," or "scapegoat." Forgiveness is giving up hope for a better past. Little progress can be made by merely attempting to repress what is evil; our great hope lies in developing what is good. - Calvin Coolidge The crisis of the West is the crisis of philosophy. - Allan Bloom, "The Closing of the American Mind" Everyone is rich that trusts themselves. - Kuldeep Gulati Why do we cry when we see huge accomplishments? We weep for the Secretariat inside all of us. In these poignant moments, we cry because we know for a fact that there is something in us that could be every bit as great as what we are watching. We are, for that moment, the very greatness we are seeing. But we get tears in our eyes because we know the greatness isn't being realized. - Steve Chandler, "100 Ways to Motivate Yourself"

"Vision is the art of seeing the invisible." -- Jonathan Swift "Never let your memories be greater than your dreams." -- Doug Ivester "I skate to where the puck is going to be, not where it has been." -- Wayne Gretzky "Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them and try to follow them." -- Louisa May Alcott "The world is moving so fast these days that the man who says it can't be done is generally interrupted by someone doing it." -- Harry Emerson Fosdick

"Trust in God, but lock your car." ~ Anon "Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics." ~ Fletcher Knebel A man can know nothing of mankind without knowing something of himself. - Benjamin Disraeli To go against the dominant thinking of your friends, of most of the people you see every day, is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform. - Theodore H. White Lawyers are like nuclear warheads. I have them because the other guy has them. - "Other People's Money" Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow. - Ralph Waldo Emerson The activist is not the man who says the river is dirty. The activist is the man who cleans up the river. - H. Ross Perot Raphael paints wisdom; Handel sings it, Phidias carves it, Shakespeare writes it, Wren builds it, Columbus sails it, Luther preaches it, Washington arms it, Watt mechanizes it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson High achievement always takes place in the framework of high expectation. - Jack Kinder True glory consists in doing what deserves to be written; in writing what deserves to be read; and in so living as to make the world happier and better for our living in it. - Pliny the Elder (23-79 A.D.)

The more you sweat in peacetime, the less you bleed during war. -- Chinese Proverb It is no longer good enough to cry peace. We must act peace, live peace and live in peace. -- Native America Proverb

We forbid any course that says we restrict free speech. -Kathleen Dixon, Director of the Women's Studies Department, Bowling Green State University, Ohio as reported on Fox News

"The elevator to success is out of order. You'll have to use the stairs...one step at a time." - Joe Girard

The Year is: 1800 1 vote gives Thomas Jefferson the presidency over Aaron Burr 1839 1 vote wins the Massachusetts governorship for Marcus Morton 1868 1 vote saves Andrew Johnson's presidency 1941 1 vote strengthens selective service before World War II 1960 1 vote per precinct gives JFK the presidency 2000 1 vote, your vote, can make the difference November 7th In America, as well as the rest of the world, 1 VOTE DOES MATTER. Be the ONE. Make the difference, SEND THIS TO A FRIEND.

I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forego their use. - Galileo Galilei Virtue is not always amiable. - John Adams (1735-1826) All limitations are self-imposed. - Ernest Holmes All, too, will bear in mind this sacred principle, that though the will of the majority is in all cases to prevail, that will, to be rightful, must be reasonable; that the minority possess their equal rights, which equal laws must protect, and to violate which would be oppression. - Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) Autumn leaves: Catch nature's finest show before it's too late. - CNN storyline The secret of success in life, is for a man to be ready for his opportunity when it comes. - Benjamin Disraeli I find politics the single most uninspiring, unemotional and insensitive activity on this planet. - Adam Ant

"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun." ~ Katharine Hepburn "Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. inside a dog it's too dark to read." ~ Groucho Marx

A drunk came from a bar at two o'clock in the morning and promptly walked into the nearest light post. Unable to see straight, he felt the post carefully with his hands and proceeded to walk all around it three or four times, examining all sides of the post with his hands. Finally, he slumped down on the curb and buried his head in his hands. "It's no use," he sobbed. "I'm walled in."

From Evelyn *Hugs* Kierkegaard: "To cheat oneself out of love is the most terrible deception. It is an eternal loss for which there is no reparation, neither in time or in eternity."

"The genius of you Americans is that you never make clear-cut stupid moves, only complicated stupid moves which make us wonder at the possibility that there may be something to them which we are missing. -Gamel Abdel Nasser

One reason why George Washington Is held in such veneration: He never blamed his problems On the former Administration. -- George O. Ludcke

"Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." ~ Robert A. Heinlein "I love boxing. Where else do two grown men prance around in satin underwear, fighting over a belt?... The one who wins gets a purse. They do it in gloves. It's the accessory connection I love." ~ John McGovern "A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I'd just like to say to the authors of that study, "Duh!" ~ Conan O'Brien

"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away and you have their shoes, too." ~ Unknown

IMPORTANT VOTING DAY INFORMATION Due to an anticipated voter turnout much larger than originally expected, the polling facilities may not be able to handle the load all at once. Therefore, Republicans are requested to vote on Tuesday, November 7, and Democrats, Independents, Green and Reform Party members, etc on Wednesday, November 8. Please pass this message along and help us to make sure that nobody gets left out. -2000 Presidential Election Commission ************ tftd received this notice from many sources. However the 'message was garbled' in the text provided me by two close friends who are DemocRATS. tftd provides the correct version as a public service.

TFTD-L@TAMU.EDU X-UIDL: U[T"!F9J"!`7Y"!1d$"! I pray Heaven to bestow the best of Blessings on this House and all that shall hereafter inhabit it. May none but honest and wise Men ever rule under this roof. -John Adams November 2, 1800 His second evening in the new White House 200 years ago this week

"I cannot discover that anyone knows enough to say definitely what is and what is not possible." - Henry Ford

"I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers." ~ Woody Allen Sign at a railroad station: "Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted."

"If you develop the absolute sense of certainty that powerful beliefs provide, then you can get yourself to accomplish virtually anything, including those things that other people are certain are impossible." - Anthony Robbins

FAST FACTS: Politicians say the darndest things: "No man is an Ireland." --Chicago Mayor Richard Daley "I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix." --Vice President Dan Quayle "Politics gives guys so much power that they tend to behave badly around women. And I hope I never get into that." --Rhodes Scholar Bill Clinton "The Internet is a great way to get on the Net." --Presidential candidate Bob Dole (Source: THE 267 STUPIDEST THINGS DEMOCRATS / REPUBLICANS EVER SAID)

"If one looks with a cold eye at the mess mankind had made of his history, it is difficult to avoid the conclusion that he has been afflicted by some built-in mental disorder which drives him towards self-destruction. Murder within the species on an individual or collective scale is a phenomenon unknown in the whole animal kingdom, except for man, and a few varieties of ants and rats." - Arthur Koestler