oops! brain fart! Trying to enter the above in topic 2 (what I ate today) but was all over the board telnetting. But... while we're here. Anyone have any thoughts on this yummy combo?

Mmmmm! I love smoked oysters, but they give me a migraine. Have you tried the salmon-flavored cream cheese? It's not terrible. The cheesecake one is good, although it has a phony aftertaste.

This morning after breakfast and orange juice, I tried the smoked cigarette cream cheese. My taste buds were extremely engaged and the cream cheese stayed lit throughout. My most recent girlfriend (she started at 8:30 a.m. today) says I should try it with oysters Rockefeller, mixed in with Indian fritter of chickpea flour. Soon. Soon. Don't wanna rush it. I'm glad she's not the urgent impatient type.

LOL! Never tried the cigarette flavored. I'm sure I'd dislike smoke as much orally as I do nasally. Autumn, my bagel ritual includes the smoked salmon flavored cream cheese... the one with bits of fish flesh floating around in it. I crave it!

Autumn, my bagel ritual includes artichoke slinkies and Big Mac brassieres under the weight of deep trance music that uses heavy tom-toms ---I need to have quite a few old vaudevillians dressed in period costumes from 14th century Namibia, where they're walking through and passing the hat among the kids for nickels and dimes and Afghan rebel tattoo designs. I crave it and I have to have it every day of my life, and I have so far.

I LOVE waking up to posts like this... starts my day off better than a long, hot, steamy shower! (well almost)

Maybe Mr. le Plep should have his own morning show, "Alarm Clock Jim"...

anything is possible in the age of the Teletubbie (A friggin HORRIBLE children's program in my opinion!)

One time I was a kid and when I was, I got into a long hot steamy shower with a buncha other kids because there was this waterproof TV show on ---it was about these old men who were boozers aided by the full bottle and the conversation among the men was about how they were noticing that their legs were of different length ---then the men gathered round this TV set and started watching it and what was on was these kids takin' a long hot steamy shower and I was one of them---then Steve Buscemi came into the shower and kinda joined us, but he said real important stuff to us, like he said that he did biopsies on 74 living presidents of this our country, and he said that there were some old drunk men watching us on TV, and we believed him because he was Steve and he talked through a voice synthesizer and he could turn genes off and on as fast as we could and as he was walking away from us all dripping clean, he told us these very important words---that love consists of a plastic dummy on a bed....his wife

Sonja here: That is a very interesting response, Mr. le Plep. (That is not your real name, is it?) A little surreal, but interesting.

Here Sonja, too. My real name has always been Leplep Sonja le Plep. Truth and reality are stranger than surreal fiction, and the above experience actually occurred, several times. You see, it all started when I was born and then within a few small years I became a genuine kid. Other kids I met also were born, like me, and we did all kinds of stuff, like take long hot steamy showers together. It was a tribute to our deep love for hippopotomuses, which we'd notice on Ab Fab, a nature show that showed animals doing water sports of their own making. The hippos would give each other long hot steamy showers, and my best friend Duppy told me most of those hippo shows were taped in Namibia, a town I've never been t , but I hear it's somewhere. Well, like I say, a few old gentlemen who had high alcohol content in their blood, they liked to watch us on TV because we would design fashionable voodoo apparel for nude zombies. I'm quite saddened by this news, as well, but feel obligated to tell it to you, and it is this: the apparel is now only available in Boston, although it's always on sale, and it's always quite wet. And as you know, all kids are psychically mobile, and we were too, and we'd watch Wooloomooloo, a V station that set a few minds at ease because it usually had programming that featured drunk old men watching kids shows on Saturday mornings. Only a couple of those shows were about me and my friends, most of 'em were about road conditions in those towns known as Angola and Botswana (I wouldn't know where they are, but I truly suspect that they're somewhere, but can't be sure).

Here Sonja (Le Plep Not): WOW! You'd rather be called Mr. Gross, wouldn't you? Sorry about that. Good thing you watched those hippo shows - you'll recognize me straight away if ever we should meet....

"Ms. Smith" and "Mr. Gross"---I'm guessing those are names we wouldn't really like to be called. Putting "Sonja" in the middle of "Leplep le Plep" was my way of saying, "Yeah, Leplep is not my real name." But I don't mind being called Leplep. And I was guessing that your calling me "Mr. Gross" was your way of playing with me. Sometimes it happens that people play rough with each other when they're playing, like they have dagger points in their eyes, but your way is gentler, much easier to take in. I like that quality in you. It's nice. The other thing that happened with me with my last response was that I was reacting to that word you used ("surreal").....and so anyway it somehow led to me retelling the story slightly differently but just as surreally. I have this susceptibility to being sensitive there, because I sense that my writing gets to people in untoward ways that they don't particularly appreciate on occasion---like I've gotten reactions like, or something like (and these aren't the exact words or anything), "I find the surreal offends me" or "can we finally get back on topic" or "psychotic" or "psychedelic" and others I can't recall. It's true that it is surreal. But sometimes that surreal stuff seems to annoy. Sometimes not. Maybe people feel I'm not being on the level with them when I do that. Maybe they're going with it somehow onto and into the subliminal and at that point maybe there are touchy disturbances that go off. Maybe they feel like there's not much point to what I'm saying at those times and they suspect something underhanded may also be operating. Even when people like the surreal, I get the feeling they mostly just sorta tolerate it as being some sort of exercise in lateral thinking or something. But me, it means much more than that to me. The surreal can move into things from angles that are unavailable any other way. Not that other ways can't also move into things, and very deeply, of course, and meaningfully. The angles are just different, and sometimes those angles are just too sharp or dumb or dull and meet the eye and stand out in a tangle of sharp angles that irritate and that are found tiresome or something of that ilk. I feel that stuff going on in the Spring reactions to my surreal responses sometimes, and it affects me, it feels like an undercurrent that's just there and not just in my imagination. Do you know what I mean by any of this? I coulda not brought it up, but thought I might as well anyway, for what it's worth.

No no, you make sense. I am sorry - I meant 'surreal' as a sort of compliment. Your response suddenly had me thinking of Kafka, and I enjoy the ones I have read so far. They are different from all the others, and that is always interesting. And feel free to say if something I say touches a sore spot - feel free to guide me through your world. I have one question, though, to which I would like a one-word, honest answer. 'The rough playing and dagger points' - they refer to my sister, right? I have seen the other people here's responses, and they don't seem likely to harm in any way.

no is my one word answer. it refers to me and others, including Riette. that's honest from me, and what you wanted. and I knew you were being positive about "surreal" because you had used the word "interesting" but it's a sore spot anyway and works on me anyway. which doesn't mean at all to not use that word. I was just telling you something about me....that's what it was.... sorry if that sounds all too nutty but it's somehow actually just honest

Sure. I understand. We all do that, I think. Human relationship is a complicated issue. It gets really puzzling, I know. Where does 'good play' end, and 'rough play' begin? Don't answer if you don't want to.

You're asking some really good questions. Yeah, questions that start at the beginning. We're in the open now. There's a clearing here where we're standin' at. It feels okay. Ok, to me, it seems like, well let's take 2 people.... if they know each other's ways and have really shown signs that they get it and like it (the other person's tendencies and expressions and intent), then there's so much more leeway for deeper sharper more critical kinds of teasing. That can be done and it can breathe life into what they have goin'. It's like reeling in the benefits of being able to laugh at ourself through another person's setting it up, as they poke fun with some real pokes. I just think where the playing can get rough is when at least one person still isn't showing that they can take what's going on without taking it the wrong way (getting bewildered, or misunderstanding something, or being hurt). Now if one person wants to change the range, so they can play rough and have it be alright with the other person, then the other person has to be clued in on how the rough stuff really works and how it really stays good, just rougher now. To clue the other person in on how rough stays good, now that isn't so easy, I don't think. The other person has to be able to (invited to) really freely ask probably lotsa questions, some of which may be fairly unaccountable right off the bat, since they might go in there somewhere where questions go when they smack up against something concealed, something we'd just prefer not to go into unless we're in the right mood or something. So we might react defensively, and sorta thwart what we think the other person is wondering about....we could become resistant and passive aggressive about it, and turn that into another kind of playing. If that can't be overcome, then communication remains at a standstill when it needs to not stand still if the other person is to ever be clued in on how rough play can really be good for both people. Isn't it nice, though, to remember that there are incredible heights of originality and fun and unearthing of what wasn't there before and crippling laughter and relating, that can happen when the playing isn't anything anywhere close to being rough at all? I dunno how ya feel about it, though.....what are you feeling?

I think I can see where you're going, but I'm confused. I mean, the responses I have read so far seem pretty light hearted and easy-going and everything. I cannot tell how that can offend. But before I go ahead and say a bunch of things about communication and stuff, you must know that my sister is probably my only really close friend in the world (besides my husband, of course) - that is a malfunction or something, I suppose, since I have never been able to truly trust anyone else with the kind of fri ndship and closeness I have with her. I have no women friends or male friends or anything like that. Also, I have to admit in all honesty that I have not felt the need either, so the only things that I know about communication in friendship (if one can call on-line chatting friendship), are the things I have learned in this particular friendship. And it's funny, and a little confusing as I said before, because the things you describe above, the modes of communication, with the many questions, the defen iveness, even the critical kinds of teasing - those are precisely the things that make it such a great friendship for me. I mean, we do all of those things. We probe each other, we struggle with each other, we break out in crippling laughter, we criticize when the other deserves it; sometimes we accept the criticism, and other times we become defensive, we are fiercely honest with one another, we share our pain and our pleasure, absolutely everything. I have never ever perceived of it as rough or woun ing though, because through it all we remain equals. And as long as we remain aware of the fact that we are equals in everything, we can trust enough to know that playing is just playing; there is no deeper motive, no malicious intent. But that is all I can say, I'm afraid, and it seems I'm in no better position than you here. I can imagine that it might work differently in the world out there/here??, but I cannot quite tell how. I'm just sort of following instinct here, and trying not to play too mu h with the people here as I play with my sister, because I'm not sure how that would work. Is that a bad thing, do you think?

It does work differently, I think. But I've only started suspecting it since I've come here. The world outside us IS confusing.

You're twins. You're super close to each other. Do you ever have times when you have fights that end bad, where you have a strong desire to not have anything to do with each other for awhile? If so, maybe something got too rough. Since you guys are who you are (you know each other's instincts inside out, plus you are two sisters who get along great rather than many other sisters who don't at all), your relationship to each other will be real different from your relationship with those strange foreigners at Spring (just joshing there). And so yeah, it's gonna make sense to ease in gradually, moderately, as is your preference, if that's what it is, when acquainting yourself with the springers. I think there hasn't been anything malicious at Spring since you've been here, Sonja, so nothing to see yet there. I think maliciousness can be invisible to the one who is malicious. I think the one who is hurt by supposed maliciousness can be malicious in their way of holding onto the hurt. I think maliciousness can happen while wearing disguises like politeness, or unresponsiveness (like intentional neglect), or responding but in a stuffy way, or by sarcasm, or by not explaining what we mean when it's obvious to us that the other person could have trouble getting the drift, or by being curt, etc. I can see that other people need to be the way they are, and I need to be the way I am, that we all have accumulated inside of us a bunch of collective and individual pasts (or unconsciousnesses), and there are good reasons for why we react with our reactions. But I also feel we all put off learning more and more about compassion and sensitivity, the kind that is just spontaneous and where the learning is unexpected and unguarded and not controlling and not guided, not calculating, where it's not watching to direct or heal or change or transform. The learning about each other can be innocent and unpremeditated. And the same with the learning about our own self, our own emotional states. I think we are all equals, and we are equal in our maliciousness. I think that the different forms maliciousness takes in different people fools us into thinking this person is much less malicious than that person. But I think the distancing, the emotional or character armor is about the same in all of us. We're equals. It comes out equal. Anyway, I'm feeling that the play gets rough sometimes, in nice ways, so nice that the one who's hurt would never divulge such a thing---it's taboo. It's just part of life, the way things are. We don't even think it's malicious or rough. We're glad it's there.....spices things up.....or blunts us with stuff that we feel we have to accept like paying our dues or taking our knocks. We're numb like that. That's what it means to be alive in this world. But this is just me talkin'. Obviously. Gotta take what I say with a grain of salt. I'm pretty annoying probably when it comes to this stuff. People may be only too glad to confirm that in moments like these. Oh well.....so what else is new.....

You're not annoying at all. Your response is pretty long, there is alot to respond to, and so I'll just take it from the top. I don't think there has passed a single day in my life where I didn't talk to/want to talk to Ri�tte. She is a part of the air that I breathe, and not feeling her close to me every day would suffocate me, I think. We did have a bit of a hard time when we each got married in countries so far apart. We were really miserable the first two years or so, and I think we each half resented each other for it. But we never stopped talking about it, and now I think it is exactly that sort of communication, throu h good times and bad times alike, that keeps our friendship so strong - in fact, I feel we're still growing closer. We never ever run out of things to talk about. She never runs out of surprises, and I still manage to shock her too sometimes. I love that about our friendship. But you are probably right: it is a different sort of friendship from outside friendships. The world out there is not as safe and uncomplicated as the US-hood. That malice your talking about - I have not experienced it. I feel afraid to explore the kind of relationships/friendships where people might think me maliscious, or where I might me maliscious without knowing I am, just because I treat them like my sister. I mean, from my end it feels like I SHOULD be the same kind of friend to others as to h r, since I am her best friend, and since I would go through anything with her; it feels like friendship should be that. And yet you tell me it shouldn't, and that one should treat others differently. I know in my head that you are right, but leaves me without an important answer. How then does one treat other friends? Or rather: how do you treat other friends sincerely? How does one treat other friends sincerely without being maliscious? Stupid questions, I know; nevertheless questions without answers for me. That's why I tend to be a coward, and not get closer than just friendliness. I think I may have these difficulties because I cannot remember the learning process you're talking about. I have never even thought about it. We probably 'learned' our friendship when we were so young there COULD be no pre-meditation or questioning, just acceptance - because we were ourselves as innocent as the friendship. One tends to want just the same sort of trust and acceptance from other people, and to give them just that sort of trust - but with the one or two friendships I have had (none of wh ch worked out, I must confess), it didn't work that way at all. I was dissappointed, because they didn't WANT my trust, and it dissappointed and wounded me so deeply that I've not had the courage to try again for years now. I know what I did wrong now of course, but that is no guarantee that it's not going to happen again, and that I won't go about it the wrong way again, and so I don't ever summon up the courage to make friends. I would never have dared come to a place like this without knowing I have my sister here. Do you know, even now our brothers-in-law still ring us up from time to time, desperate for us to explain to them how the other sister's head works! I guess that makes sense. I can explain Ri�tte far better than I can explain myself, and she knows far better who I am than I do. I dread to think how we would fare without each other. Sisterhood has it's ups AND downs, doesn't it? But now I'm rambling . . . what else is new?

I was afraid to open up your response and read it. I was afraid your reaction would be real positional and opposed to me. But you were not like that. You gave me a chance to come in and sit down with your words and consider them like they were perched with me on a bluff overlooking the sea. Nice sea breeze coming in. And over there across the roofs of inns are gulls in flight and they collapse in mid-air and swoop down into the water for some dinner maybe. And I am wondering about trust. When I use the words "us" or "we" or "our" or "ourselves", I'm using them in the general sense, to mean people or everybody, like "you" in general, not you Sonja. It's so hard not to think about ourselves. But close friendships are a relief from ourselves. I like to escape into another person's life and see if I can live it too. I like to listen to them tell me what's going on with them, and it's like I'm listening to me talking to me about me. I'm in there. But somewhere along the line I get antsy and tentative, and begin to feel like I'm over and out and somewhere else away and drifting. What turns an acquaintance into a friendship, and a friendship into a close friendship is a nurturing chemistry that wants us both and we give in to it because the momentum is right, the translation and the originality of it all is right. And it just spurs on our curiosity. Our curiosity about what it feels like. The moods we're in and the stuff we go through when we're with and inside this growing friendship......that's how the other person gives me a generous helping of give-and-take that really helps. When their eyes look down and their voice trails off, I quick stop imagining everything and I focus on what their hands are telling me and I melt strangely into the country of their heart, the beauty of their weariness, their erstwhileness, the jumpy changes in their pulse. I try to throw off everything I've ever known. I try not to try. I give over. There's an emotion that wants to stream out. It will tell all but only in personal rhythms that are hearable through softer frequencies that secrete secrets meant only for the formless floating tremor of an unaffected smile. And a closeness comes in to blink us awake. I thought I was going to go on for some time, but I'm suddenly leaning over into sleep---it caught up with me---and my bed is reaching out at me and lunging for my carcass. I don't know what I said or why, or whether or not it feels like it follows what you were saying at all....I didn't think I was going to be this sleepy yet.

Very nice response. More I can't say, because it makes sense, I can relate to all that. Ri�tte told me I'd enjoy your responses, and she was right. You do have cool things to say. Did you sleep well?

HI. I'm stacey. I hate people. Is that so WRONG?!?!?! Whew. Apologies guys. It just got a little heady in here for me in the topic about smoked oysters and cream cheese. I felt overwhelmed with the power of accidental creation. Kinda like, well, I created this topic (accidently) and now, look at what it has wrought. Communication. Intimate, honest, sincere (I have a penchant for redundancy), truthful, interesting, personal, global, friendly-like communication. I am nervous as if the bonds of this communication are fragile but I know I shouldn't be nervous because although the ties SEEM tenuous, they may indeed be stronger than anything I could've created while seriously trying. And I guess the 'creation' is a strong word. I helped to create a forum, a medium for these interactions to take place. And they took place without me. I feel simeltaneously insignificant and omnipotent. (really glad to have you here Sonja. And still really glad to have you here Jim!)

I for one sure am glad you hate people, Stacey. Now I feel like I can go out and look for a job. I'm renewed and nothing holds me back now. No, but, your energy is a really cool factor in life. However it comes out. It does make things happen. Lotsa really good things (in spite of itself....because of itself). .....your energy....your you....your energy....your you..... when I was a hari krishna (not), that was our mantra day in and day out we had the happiest hari-hari's of all the devotees the world over....

our temple was run by these two monks (or monkettes) and this was like 25 years ago but their names, get this, they were: Tahja and Rafikki ---well, one time late at night when everyone else was asleep I was up pacing the floor worrying about maliciousness and whatnot or whatever and there in their room I saw them: Tahja was licking Rafikki and not all over, either it was just in this one place and it kept going on and going on and going on I can tell you that we had alotta deities we had to offer our praise and thanks and reverence to and on the highest plane (or highest level....or highest shelf) was this deity called Stay-and-See .....ummm, but we all called it Stay-see for short besides it was the shortest of all the deities see, all the deities were figures that were sculpted so we could see 'em and stuff anyway, the Stay-see deity was in the shape of a beautiful woman don't look now, but she was sitting on a mountain bike and the wheels were always spinning ......that deity was actually able to do that (spin her wheels constantly) and so I always thought the bike had to be levitating for that to happen ---it was like a miracle in a way

(lmao!) The similarities are amazing. Trying not to sound overwhelmed with conceit... Another of my accidental creations has been my ability to spin my proverbial wheels. Round and round and round again with no particular change in either forward motion or vertical rise. You see, in attempting to search for my purpose in society (not in life), I have tried a few professions hither, tither and yon and, instead of perfecting a particular skill, honing in on an individual desire/goal, I inadvertantly have taught myself how to spin those proverbial wheel. Of course, I do not spin with such gra e that I appear to be levitating and the infamous and now very famous Stay and See but spin them in place and incessantly I do. Wow. What a coincidence. (How's the wheel spinning going on the job search by the way?)

It gets ridiculous sometimes Here's a for instance....I get a call from a clerk in a human resources department of a state agency and she needs verification that I've been to high school, something in hard copy that has the graduation date on it. I say, "But don't those transcripts of classes I took at Austin Community College and Penn State imply that I've been to high school?" She says, "I have to follow the procedures. And that's all I need for your application to move off my desk and go forward in the process." So I call Judy in State College, Pennsylvania---she's the registrar for the high school, and will access my records, and I give her the name of the human resources person I'd talked to 5 minutes earlier, and I'm about to give Judy the HR person's fax number, and Judy says she doesn't have a fax machine, but that she'll get it in the mail first thing in the morning if I give her the HR person's address. I do. BTW, in case you wanna keep this in mind for future reference, Judy says she's been to Austin once when she came to see a Penn State football game against Texas.

I hate football - it's so boring.

hey, leplep, they're just checking to make sure you didn't skip high school.

skip-a-dee-doo-dah I hate high school - it's so boring

Not only boring, but I found it about ten years too ripe for me - emotionally, that is.

More like twenty!

That was 6 years ago, right? And too many were emotionally overripe because their hormones were overactive? And when they'd talk they'd jump from laughing to crying to beaming to sulking to cracking up to deep clinical depression to heartwarmingly adorable to freaking out to aloof to ingratiating to glowering to magnetic to yucky to yummy to heavy-handed to atwitter with gushy chatter to sloe-eyed and subhuman to tender-hearted and warm to bursting into hysterics to palsy-walsy good-natured to accusatory to ardently big-hearted to bitter and blunt to gracious and personable to abrubtly cutthroat and cranky to romantic to bleak to sensual to dour to touchingly merciful to distant to summery to domineering to genially familiar in a way you were fond of vengeful and mean to chummy and affectionate? And all that within, say, 5 minutes time, typically?

Yeah, employers really hate it when kids drop out of high school and go straight to Ivy League colleges. It goes on their permanent records, you know. Jim, are you really from State College? My parents are from Lewistown, and we make the trip at least twice a year to be overwhelmed by family, listen to their Dutchy accents and buy Amish crap.

Yeah. Boy that sounds familiar....like from a faraway past. Been through Lewistown a bunch when I was a kid. Never did anything there, just passed through. But I'd like to hang out with those Dutchy types and some Amish in those rolling Lancaster hills and country farmland....if I was just uninhibited enough and knew where in the heck I went and laid down my pitchfork. I think, though, the Dutch were really getting into arena football and standing up in the stands and trying to do the WAVE and throwing their waffles at the opposing fans (probably other family members) because they'd make hex signs into their waffles.

You mean they were making hex signs in their cracklins!! My aunt always says stuff like, "Now, hon, I know you-uns are vegetarians, so instead of cracklins and eggs for breakfast, I got you-uns some sticky buns, OK?" It's like another era there. I love it.

I'd have alotta fun with yer aunt alright.

What are sticky buns, Autumn????

Is this another rhetorical question like the white trash one, Riette?! They are danish-type pastries slathered with either gooey white icing or gooey syrup/honey combo and sprinkled with cinnamon and/or pecans. Truly abominable nutritionally, they leave your hands and face as sticky as if you were eating paste.

We are talking ultra delicious, Ri�tte.

White trash like 'em, too!

Next best thing to chicken pot pie...

How am I supposed to know about those things?? In Switzerland the closest thing to white trash are people who buy Cadbury's chocolate. Like me.

Ooh, what a snob! :-)

Did I mention how homesick I am for my third world home country?

No, do you feel this way a lot?

Ri�tte loves the desert. When we used to go to holiday together, we'd always climb a dune, watch the sun set over the ocean, and stare at the stars for hours. Life is just so much more basic in Africa. That's what I miss. But it's your question, girl.

You've answered it. It's the desert, and the solitude, and the simplicity I get homesick for. And yes, I miss it all the time, Terry. I mean, I like Europe too, but in my heart I'll always be Namibian, never European.

What does it mean to be Namibean. Where does the word come from?

I spent a week in State College, PA. It seemed like a very long time. My memories are fond... I learned to play pinball in an arcade near the Rathskeller.

Once had a roommate who went to Penn State. I was surprised that he was in a fraternity there (he's not really the type). He said there's not much to do in State College and the locals don't like college kids hanging out in their bars, so if you want to drink or meet girls, you've GOT TO join a frat.

oh i guess it's just like any other place in the world it's got people in it some are flunking outa school some are walking along an unfinished highway on their way to a bus stop some like to hang out with their grandfather, who might be a stone carver some head for the hungry part of town each night some are studying a line drawing by Paul Klee while exchanging trade secrets with the ex-prisoner who's tilting a cauldron some are walkin' outa their neighborhood cuz it's girl scout cookie day some are experiencing the tumult of an empty room as a way of being some are remarking about corn silk as the air moves through some nearby pussy willows some can't sleep tonight and have both eyes on their journal some just can't say goodbye to someone they are intimate with some watch their mother rock their baby sister quietly and hum some are learning to play rock and roll piano on a huge pipe organ some are passin' thru on their way to Texas, horses, mules and wild peach some are walkin' home from a place they don't understand that their older brother took them to some are drinking a new moon through the window some dodge peripheries and anti-worlds while describing their date to a roommate some just sang a soft song to a dying body some are writing their English paper but their mind is completely on the falling apart of time some are thinkin' they're so ugly, though choice is pinching them now in funny directions nearer and nearer those emotional watercolors on a pond some are realizing at this very moment that the best music is what happens

those are worm thoughts in their familiarity and even the not-so-familiar images seem familiar now

While I was in high school, I thought it was utter NONSENSE, most of the stuff they were teaching. I wanted OUT in the worst way. Then I went to college, and I learned a lot, although most of what I learned was not in the classroom. The most important thing that I learned in college was that each person is responsible for their own learning, that everything that occurs has lessons to be learned, that I had to figure out what I could learn from what was happening, and learn all that I could.

I hated school, because it was so authoritarian - all we did was obey the whims of perverse teachers. I hated it because it discriminated against everyone who didn't think exactly as they were supposed to. I don't think school taught me anything, except a loathing of authority. Since I've been out I've learned alot more by travelling, reading things for myself, seeing them for myself - I never want to stop travelling, and can't wait for my kids to be big enough to be able to tour and work all over the developing world with them. Until then I have finally summoned up the courage to get a university degree, and attended my first lecture last Friday - it was great!

WOW!! That took courage! Most of the intolerant instructors I had, were in college. You'll have to keep updates on this posted.

I shall indeed, cowering and full of apprehension as I am! The part I found rather puzzling was that one's not allowed to ask questions, and I had quite a few. I suppose the tutorials will fix that once I start officially in February.

In an American college, most classes consist of a lecture, in which you took notes, (or taped the whole thing), and a discussion section, where you could ask questions. The discussion section was at a different time and location from the lecture. The lecture was taught by the professor, and had between 300 and 2500 students in attendence. The discussion section was taught by a Teaching Assistant, (usually a grad student), and had between 10 and 30 students. At the college I attended, it was not necessar to attend the lectures, you could subscribe to a note taking service, and pick up notes 2 hours after the lecture. Usually the notes were put out by the same TA's that taught the discussion sections, so they covered all that was pertinent. At that time the notes cost fifty cents a week per class.

When I was in college I used to cut classes to sit i the library and read books. That was my real education.

YES, I also got the majority of my education outside of the classroom. I was active in student association, (student government). We filed suit to gain control of the university, went to the state supreme court, and won the control over all non-academic matters, which also gave us indirect control over the academics. I was part of a council of nine students which pretty much ran the day-to-day operations of the university.

what do you do now Tim?

I am a heavy truck driver. I can make more money at this than anything else I'm qualified for.

a local route or long distances?

I drove longhaul for six and a half years. During that time, I lost contact with nearly all of my friends, primarily because, during that time, I spent a total of 30 days in Austin. I swore that I would never drive longhaul for any length of time again. So, now I drive mostly local, although I do short stints of longhaul. I don't ever drive a route, I just go where the load goes. Since I've gotten off the road, I've gone to: Laredo, El Paso, Del Rio, Shreveport, Dallas, San Antonio, Oklahoma City, Tulsa, Sioux City IA, Raleigh NC, Denver CO, and LA. When I was on the road, I was all over the continental US and southern Canada.

Holler at Stacey when you cruise through Denver!

I always stop in Denver. One of the best truck stops inthe US is in Denver. Sapp Brothers. Best prices on electronics at any truck stop in north America. I bought all my CB stuff there.

That must be so much fun! My cousin is a long distance truck driver too, and during summer school holidays I often went with him to different places in South Africa, after which he would bring me back to the farm, and visit me for a few weeks. It was really wonderful. We ate tons of burgers, and I'm sure that's where my coke drinking habit must come from.

Probably is where you got the habit, when I was on the road I drank Mountain Dew in excessive quantities, around 9-12 liters a day. I became addicted to the caffeine, finally got off it two years ago, and now, it makes me sick. I liked the travel though, when I didn't have to make time. I got to see a lot of the country.

At my university there were no TA's and I never had a single class in a lecture hall. It was much more personal (well, not that the profs actually knew our names).

There are a lot of advantages to a small university. However, cost is usually not one of them. Our undergrad tuition was 286.50 a semester for up to 24 credits. how much was yours?

$286 a semester?? What a bargain!! I paid $1200/semester in tuition at Towson State Univ.; there were about 15,000 students (of which 22 were French majors). How many students in your college?

45000 happy souls. not counting grad students.

There may be a time differential here too, Autumn. I graduated in the spring of 1977.

45,000 students, NOT counting the grad students???? (*having chest pains*) The anxiety is setting in! I felt overwhelmed at TSU, but then I'm very small-town in every way. I was a December grad in 1990, although my nephew is there now and enrollment is the same.

By 8am there was no parking to be had for two miles in any direction. and the dorms had three towers, the tallest was 27 stories. The library had 12 million volumes, not counting microfiche.

I think college parking woes are universal!! The bookstore used to sell these T-shirts that said, "The Top 10 Lies at TSU" (a' la Letterman) and number one was "Sure, there's plenty of parking!"

At 3am on monday morning, in the middle of summer, that is probably true.

They're always taking things out of context, you know?

Ain't that the truth? Reminds me of the recruiter's promises when I went into the army.

Continue?

Oh sure, we were all going to live in condominiums. With swimming pools, weight rooms. Large cafeterias. etc. Little things were left out. Like: The condos weren't to be built for ten years. There is approximately one swimming pool per brigade. There is usually one weight room for ea. 10000 men. The large cafeterias had to feed three times as many people as they could seat. etc.

Holy $hit, that's bad! And that's when you decided enough is enough?

Oh no, After basic they sent me to Monterey, one day I took a hotel manager to my barracks room to show him the view. He positively drooled. He told me that a room with a view like that, would go for a thousand dollars a night and stay booked all year. All of the rooms in the barracks had views like mine. We sat on top of the mountain that forms the backbone of the monterey peninsula. We could watch the sun rise over monterey bay and watch it set over the pacific ocean.

That sounds beautiful. Where is Monterey? And how long were you there?

167.5km South of San Francisco. I was there 1 year. That is where language school was.

And this was the place with the beautiful peninsula where you watched the sun rise and set. Why didn't you stay there forever?

Believe me, Riette, I would have stayed if I had a choice. However, I was in the army, and, I had to go where they sent me.

You can retire there someday then - when you're a 100 or so.

I could, Riette, but it would not be the same. The barracks are on US government property. I'd have to find a place in town.

Just live in your truck - that way you can sleep wherever you fancy!

Actually, that is not a bad idea, Riette. I know of people that do it.

I would love to live like that.

So would I riette, and then just wander out in the desert, and move about as it suited me.

Oh, that's the life! Imagine travelling Europe and America and AFrica and Asia and Australia - EVERY continent in the world - like that! THAT would be a life worth living.

Riette, that would be great fun!!

Okay, let's go. We'll start off tomorrow. Better get packing!

I'm packed, Riette, how about you?

Oh, hell, I didn't even bother! I'll just go as I am!