Sonja's childhood, as told by Riette

Well, well, well! Where shall I start? Blackmail?

What blackmail?

Start with the basics, then get to the lurid details.

When we were little, and wanted to play different games, she always had me giving in by saying, "If you don't play this game with me, I'll tell Mum about those ten incredibly naughty things you did." And then later it became twenty naughty things. I lied awake in bed every night, wondering what ten or twenty incredibly naughty things were, and fearing what Mum might do to me if Sonja really told her some day. When we were about 15, I asked Sonja once what exactly those incredibly naughty things were, and she said, 'WHAT? You actually believed me???' Which was what made me realize just how stupid I really am!

What kinds of games?

The nice games had mostly something to do with cars and animals. We started building a town in the sand one year, and it didn't rain all year, and by the end of the year we'd built a HUGE town in the sand with many many little matchbox cars and little plastic army men for citizens, and a big zoo full of animals. But we had one very naughty game as well. We would sneak out at night, climb onto people's roofs and walking on it loudly. The story of the terrible ghost called, 'The Man on the Roof' even came in the daily paper, and people started going on ghost hunts and stuff - but they never caught us, and were laughing our butts off inside! But seriously, I don't know how we could have done it anymore; if the dork had caught us, he really would have killed us! But it was GREAT!

Were you two into any sports in your childhood?

Well, we ran away quite alot, if that's what you mean. But I'll leave the appropriate answer to Ri�tte....

Sonja was a good netball player. (This is YOUR childhood, so I don't have to say what I did.)

How do you play netball? What equipment is required? Is this a popular sport in SA?

Well, yeah. It's just like basketball, except you're not allowed to bounce it or move from the spot where you catch it, until you've passed it over. It's a very popular sport in SA and Australia.

You can't score points. You can't tickle the referee. When you move, you can hop on only one foot the whole way. Everyone holds a ten-foot-long pole that stays lit at both ends with green fire. Only immediate family members can play on the same team. You have to be at least 6 months old to play. It's more fun than baseball, basketball, football, soccer, wrestling, boxing, Rastafarianism, bowling, ice hockey, field hockey, polo, birth, calf roping, handball, auto racing, shinnying up a pole or rope competitions, cricket, making out, sumo wrestling, tennis, kickball, volleyball, water polo, roller derby, bobsledding, swimming, diving, going blind, triathlon, arm wrestling, dwarf tossing, tag, freeze tag, decathlon, cross-country skiing, bullfighting, skateboarding, balance beam, archery, ping-pong, walking, jump-roping, ninepins, javelin, golf, cycling, rhinoplasty, surfing, judo, ice dancing, hurdling, hurling, weightlifting, shuffleboard, motocross, luge, lawn darts, ultimate skate Frisby demolition, marathon car-touching, curling, stickball, rugby, hooverball, doubles tennis, whiffleball, yachting, go-carting, wheelchair yo-yo, elegant Boer underarm blowdrying, hang gliding, broomball, tubing, fencing, kickboxing, horseshoes, body surfing, skydiving, underwater synchronized drowning, bronc busting, ball busting, cockfighting, masturbating, backpacking, aikido, boomeranging, snowboarding, steer wrestling, windsurfing, barroom fighting, jet skiing, chuckwagon racing, snorkeling, dogsledding, trampolining, hydroplane racing, waterfall barreling, teeter-tottering, sword-swallowing, chess, speed skating, rock climbing, shot put, softball, tobagganing, croquet, miniature golfing, auctioneering, midget smuggling, tag team wrestling, jai alai, stooping, bench pressing, grocery shopping, three-legged racing, baton twirling, bareknuckle boxing, shooting, squash, tailgating, pole vaulting, racquetball, nose kissing, rafting, earthball, rollerblading, lacrosse, tug-of-war, touch football, frog jumping, steeplechase, kayaking, figure skating, telemarketing, calisthenics, isometrics, woofing, weeping, weeing---heck it's more fun than all these sports combined

More fun than stooping? For real?

LMAOOL!!!! elegant Boer underarm blowdrying!!!! ha-ha!! Did you know that Boer AWB women shave only one armpit?

the armpit that isn't shaved always has the most nose pleasing fragrance in all of Africa (and North America) scientists aren't sure why (high levels of raspberry consumption is their best hypothesis)

that's one more underarm than I shave...

LOL! I think the do it so that they'll remember to do the heil-E.T.-business with the right arm though; and when that left arm shoot up, it's like . . . DAMN!

Autumn, so your underarms, do they give off that same wonderful raspberry scent? Oh and do you salute with both arms? If so, do you do them at the same time or one and then the other? How long do you have to hold them up? Does that raspberry fragrance keep giving and giving? Oh man, I'm just thinking about that. I bet I could smell it from a room away....if I rubbed my nostrils a little, first.

LOL!

I think with Boer women it's probably more of a rotten egg scent.

A Gordon Bleeuugh scent.