advanced masturbatory device

US5501650: Automated masturbatory device Inventor(s): Gellert; Reinhard R. , Arlington Heights, IL 60004 Applicant(s): none Issued/Filed Dates: March 26, 1996 / Sept. 8, 1993 Application Number: US1993000118154 IPC Class: A61F 005/00; Class: 600/038; Field of Search: 600/38-41 128/897-899 Abstract: A variable speed motor powering a crankshaft driven sealed transducer producing pneumatically induced reciprocating motion of a receiver when a male organ is inserted. The present invention employs a hermetic system to prevent loss of synchronization. The receiver is designed with an inner liner compliant enough to accommodate a plurality of sizes and shapes of male penises. The present invention produces a stroke of approximately 3 inches at a frequency of up to 350 per minute. Primary/Assistant Examiners: Sykes; Angela D.; Lacyk; J.

this of course spurred me to see if brownpeniswax.net is a registered domain name...it isn't... (does that mean, that IBM stands for "I Be Masturbatin'"?)

LOLLOLLOL!!! I By Myself....

Hey, you like that!

in the same vein... THE NEW TAX LAW The only thing that the IRS has not yet taxed is the male penis. This is due to the fact that 40% the time it is hanging around unemployed, 30% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 10% of the time it is in the hole. On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts. Effective January 1st, 1999, your penis will be taxed according to size. The brackets are as follows: 10-12" Luxury Tax $30.00 8-10" Pole Tax $25.00 5-8" Privilege Tax $15.00 4-5" Nuisance Tax $3.00 Males exceeding 12" must file under capital gains. Anyone under 4 inches is eligible for a refund. PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION!!! Sincerely, Pecker Checker IRS NOTE: We are still waiting for answers for the following questions: * Are there penalties for early withdrawals? * What if one's penis is self employed? * Do multiple partners count as a corporation? * Are condoms a deductible expense as work clothes? * Is there an additional tax if you are not circumcised?

And is there a tax on the IBM AMD?

Apparently in South Africa they are considering making poligamy legal. I think I shall immigrate when that happens.

oh goody!! i cant wait!

For real they're making it legal? What brought this on?

man's desire to treat women as property?

THe divorce rate brought it on. South Africa has the highest divorce rate in the world, and at the bottom of it is man's inability to remain true to a single spouse. So, the way to make the divorce rate go down, you let people marry all the people they fall in love with. Plus the fact that in most black tribes poligamy takes place, and since South Africa is made up of a black majority, there is no reason why their marital practises shouldn't be included in the consitution as well.

So, are there a lot more women than men in SA? And do whites do these polygamous marriages also, or will they with the new law do you think?

I read an article about it. It seems most people want it! Except, the women insist that, just as men will be allowed to marry several women, they should be allowed to marry several men too. At which there was a huge outcry from the male side, of course.

of coure...polygyny: yes, polyandry: no just like I said earlier...

Yeah. THAT thang. You'd like that, wouldn't you?

I'd like what?

That THING! WHatever it was. WHat was it again? Some kind of advanced masturbatory device, I guess. Like a thermosflask.

if it was advanced enough to be organic...

-/- --- ah, sweet satisfacion...

thanks for sharing!

Re: Monogamy/polygamy, the ban of polygamy caused - at least in part - the tremendous increase of prostitution in Thailand and other Asian countries. Women were sent away, and to support themselves, turned onto their last resorts. And many girls are not married off, because the parents demand to much money for a poor man to come up with, and the rich men are only allowed one wife. So, imposing Western morals upon these people to cause the good created the bad.