The Screwed Spring for Dummies, 2nd Edition

You mean, like listening to two Bernese people talking to each other? HEre's a conversation I once heard between a woman and a man, concerning their son. See if you can make it out. He: "Ta Te Ta?" She: "Te Ta Ta." He: "Ta Te Ta Te?" She: "Te Ta Ta Te."

the boy had to go tee tee?

Hopefully not! He was about four. I afterwards figured out that they were saying: He: "Darf er das?" She: "Er darf das" He: "Darf er das jetzt?" She: "Er darf das jetzt."

well, that just clears it all up, doesn't it?

Darf Er es!

Jawol, mein Lieber!

Ich verstehe nicht Deutsch!!! Anglische bitte!

Oraait, oraait - Ah do you a good deel. You speak'a dee Ingels, Ah speak'a dee Afrikaner. Oukaai? Oukaai?

Thees ees a deel, yes?

Jawol, Missus!

Blitttssssssss fsshhhhhhht suune, Guurm!

Ewige Blumenkraft!

Oh Ewig, I'm snapping beans while looking at the shaft of light inside your left nostril

Gobfriedschtuz nochmal!

Gesundheit!

We're just a walking pair of dictionaries, aren't we??

Could be, Riette. However I feel handicapped, because I don't have cyrillic letters on my keyboard, I can't write Russian.

That's alright, I forgive you - just this once...

I hate to transliterate, Riette, because everybody does it differently, and so people that don't speak Russian, get to wondering who is spelling wrong?

Don't worry, I would not notice if your spelling were FLYING! Where did you learn Russian though? Do you speak it fluently? Just think, if you were Russian and I spoke only Afrikaans, we'd have to communicate with body language over the internet!

The army taught me Russian, Riette. I read, write, and speak Russian fluently. A combination of body language, amslam, and braille, sounds much better in person. Feels better too.

Did I mention that I only WRITE English?

Riette, It seems to me that I'm just going to have to expand your horizons.

Yep. It is as you say. A woman's got to do what I woman's got to do. Man, all this suffering - where will it end? It's just going to be murderous being with you, I'm sure! By the way!!! Are there any hotels not too far from Terry's house? It doesn't have to be fancy or anything - as long as I can get to you by foot, and don't have to waste time over getting taxi's and stuff.

Riette, I'll get you information on that place we talked about and several alternate places.

Okay, thank you, Tim.

Anytime, Riette, Anytime.

ANY time?

ANYTIME, RIETTE!!! ANYTIME!!

Okay, but not Monday. Monday might be an important day for me.

Ok Riette, not Monday. What's going on monday?

A very, very, very important phonecall. It's due to take place around lunchtime - my time of course - I'm very excited about it.

Lunchtime your time huh, OK , well that'll be good.

Why would that be? Are you going to make an important phonecall?

Indeed Riette, sevsera hours earlier than originally planned, but It'll work.

How did you like my new way to spell several? Riette?

I assumed you were showing off your Lithuanian....

Oh is that what you call it?

Yes! What do you call it, Tim?

Well, Riette, for lack of anything better, OOPS!!!

ha-ha!!!! Now I don't know what to say! Any ideas?

Not at the present, Riette, maybe later.